Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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