If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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