How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
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My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
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I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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