we made out on top of his cat.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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