So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize