I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize