My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize