Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
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can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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