before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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