omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
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