I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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