soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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