If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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