He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Randomize