The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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