I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
We need to rekindle our bromance
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize