Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize