you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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