Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize