was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize