He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize