You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize