just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
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