1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize