Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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