Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
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Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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