No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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