also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize