fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize