I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize