How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
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