No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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