Please, let me fuck your mom
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
You dont lie about slip and slides
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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