96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize