are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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