if i can run in heels then i can drive
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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