Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
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