nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
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