yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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