i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
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friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
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I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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