so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
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