Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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