i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize