It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
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