I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Who died my cat blue again?
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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