Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
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