i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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