im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize