i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize