His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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